i have a lot to say and something REALLY exciting to share with you all

hello my few followers, it's good to see you back here once again. since this here blog is typed, you probably can't tell that i'm being genuine. hell, even if i was talking to you in person, you might not know the difference. but i mean it. not long ago, i decided to change everything about my life and that led me down a long and grueling path. sometimes it feels like my sanity is merely hanging by a thread, but the constant support i receive makes that thread stronger.

so today, i've got a lot of ground to cover. aside from what's happening NOW, July 2019, what that means, where i'm going, blah blah blah, i also have a very special announcement to make. this may or may not be inordinately long for an update.

at the end of this blog, i will have a VERY SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT that you definitely don't want to miss.

i've broken down my numerous thoughts into four parts that you can skip through or wade through at your convenience.

part i: a lot is changing, but not fast enough.

part ii: J U L Y 2 0 1 9

part iii: if this, then what?

part iv: 2020

WARNING: a lot of personal thoughts blended with professional news. i... don't know how to be professional (don't know, or don't care?) If you want to skip all the long rants and go straight to the important updates, scroll all the way to the bottom.

alright.

part i: a lot is changing, but not fast enough

yes, a lot is changing. i mean, a couple years ago i was... ? i didn't know who i was. i was someone else entirely until one morning, i woke up and said "i want to draw comics." so i started drawing comics and realized i really really loved it. that was it. (i mean, it took months of soul searching and depression and risk taking and serious introspection, but I GOT to that morning when the time was right!)

i said i wanted to draw comics, but i wasn't very good at it. so i applied to art school. my third attempt at college finally stuck. so, fast forward two years, and i'm-- well i still don't know who i am, but i'm not so worried about that anymore. I'll tell you what tho: I AM MAKING COMICS.

That's right, folks, Blue Screen Press is up and running and alive. I have four zines currently for sale, but only two of them are available in my NEW online store. All four of them will be available this coming Saturday (July 13) at Tijuana Zine Fest in Tijuana, BC, Mexico. I'm absolutely ecstatic that i get to participate in this zine fest-- latinx lit and self-publishing are so extremely crucial to sociopolitical presence and activism. self-publishing is democracy in every sense of the word, and i'm so excited to go down there and share my art and pick up art from other super super talented creators.

after tjzf i'll be at the CBLDF welcome party for SDCC on July 18th. I'm not actually going to San Diego Comic Con (you're kidding me right?), but i will be going to the welcome party, which supports the comic book legal defense fund-- an important organization that defends my right to say fuck trump and stuff like that in my comics. so come by, lots of big talent will be there (aside from ME obviously).

between those two events, i'm mostly gonna be chilling in san diego, drinking coffee, drawing comics, and playing magic for a week. if you're around and that sounds like fun to you, please join!

part ii: J U L Y 2 0 1 9

what I realized, quite literally as I sat down and started typing this out, is that July 2019 is... kind of a special time for me. Aside from the obvious fun stuff I'll be doing this year (TJZF and the CBLDF SDCC welcome party)-- july marks 10 years since basically i fell in love with comics. and I didn't even know it yet! basically, long story short, since I grew up in San Diego comics were all around me, especially in July. I had tickets to go to SDCC for the first time-- and I ended up NOT GOING!! (don't be a loser, GO TO COMIC EVENTS).

But, I did go to an Amanda Palmer concert there. And so did Neil Gaiman. So I met Neil, and despite being a big fan of his work, I didn't actually know HE was the dude behind all those cool weird fantasy books I read in the recessed corners of my high school library. Hell, I didn't even know Neil wrote comics. But after I met him, and I learned all this cool stuff about him, a crucial step down a complicated path led me to minneapolis in 2019, flying back to san diego 10 years later to share comix that I wrote. And while it doesn't sound like much, it's honestly amazing to realize how slow and subtly life changes and people grow. So i wanted to share that with you.

part iii: if this, then what?

so, after all that about who i am and blah blah blah-- we're getting to the big stuff. the stuff i get SUPER impatient for and have to learn to take in strides, in its own time. let it happen, but not completely surrender.

being an artist is weird because, well, you have no idea what you're doing, and if you say you do you're a fucking LIAR. you have to be both humble and proud, hungry for more but not overworked, constantly moving but patient, and most importantly, you need to learn when to shut up (which clearly, i have not yet.)

so if all of this is true, and being an artist is contradictory existence, then what?

i just... keep drawing. that's the real news here, the whole blog condensed into four words. i just keep drawing. everyday, i'm drawing a LOT. sometimes, i don't draw as much, some days i don't show anyone what i drew, but some days i can't stop drawing and can't shut the hell up about it. I love drawing. and i love comics. and comics are HARD. comics are PAIN. and i love every minute of misery.

i guess, what i'm really trying to say, is that confessional is not finished (HAHAHAHAHAAH GOTCHA!!) yea. it's not! There's still more work that needs to be done! and that's what i mean about not knowing when to shut up. i get so excited when i finish the next iteration (that's what we'll call it)-- but when i finally take a moment to step back and let someone else see what i made, it's like i'm looking at a whole new book and it's not the one i imagined. so-- i don't want to publish it yet. it's not far away-- and once it's finished i'm looking at some crowdfunding ideas to print a bigger, better, and gorgeous quality. i don't want to do this unless i do it RIGHT and believe me, it WILL be worth the wait.

Death or Divorce #2 is in the works. it will be available sometime in September this year, hopefully in time for the Twin Cities Zine Fest which I will be participating in.

I'm also working on three other books. one will be a zine. the other two will be... bigger than a zine. one is an autobio. the other one is a little more-- surreal. that's all i can say about them for now. those won't be ready until 2020.

part iv: 2020

this last part is about the future, whatever the fuck that means. it's gotten to the point that just seeing the number 2020 fills me with such an awful sense of dread, my brain starts shutting down no matter what. kamala harris and joe biden? belle delphine? an earthquake in l.a.? children from my ancestral home being locked in cages by animals? vr porn? whatever it is-- my brain just immediately outputs "DOES NOT COMPUTE" and i get the blue screen.

And, i guess, that's what Blue Screen Press is all about. when something like a human brain, or the microprocessor of a computer, is built to make incredibly complex calculations-- but just one wire is misplaced, or sensory overload from too much clickbait and russian bot viruses-- the perfect feat of human engineering just gives you this little white sad face on a somber blue background. That's why Blue Screen Press 2020 is gonna be BIG. It's gonna have a lot of books. a lot of stories. a lot of places, people, things.

It's also going to be the year i finally graduate from college. but i don't want to think about that yet.

And finally, for the very basic news that you've probably come here for.

a.z.terry has a Twitch. while we're ironing out some stuff, this will basically be a space for me and other cartoonists to get together, draw cool and silly stuff, and talk about whatever our monkey brains feel like.

There is a new live website for Blue Screen Press (where you can purchase two of my books).

I will be at these two zine fests this year:

July 19, 2019 -- Tijuana Zine Fest

Sept 21, 2019 -- Twin Cities Zine Fest

And LAST but not LEAST, the very important news that I promised you. (not a joke, it's real). I previously announced that I had started a Patreon, but not very seriously. It was just there for the sake of it being there, but as I get closer to printing real books and more people start ordering them and I gain the time and facilities to make books exactly as i think they should be made, I want to open up Patreon as a space to let people support my art in whichever way they can.

So, as a sort of unofficial second launch to my Patreon and kickstart this whole thing, I am giving 20 people the opportunity to become early conspirators. For a minimum ONE DOLLAR monthly contribution, you get the whole shebang that will be provided to future Patreons, including sketch zines, a commissioned illustration, copies of all four books currently in print, and access to a secret newsletter. And, you'll be THANKED in my next book. how else can you achieve immortality?

that's gonna be everything for today. you can check out my facebook page, though i'm gonna guess you probably already have. just trying to put EVERYTHING in one place, okay?

hopefully i'll see you in san diego or tj.

much love, az